Saturday, June 21, 2008

How we found out

So by request (Hi Namita!) I've decided to post the story on how I discovered I was preggo. It's actually quite embarressing, but I think it makes sense to write this down since my mind has a way of just forgetting important stuff like this...time has a way of making me forget all the details!

Anyway G and I got hitched last November in 2007 in Chandigarh, India. It was beautiful and surreal, and I couldn't have asked for more happier moments in my life.

Our wedding night was perfect, we had the prettiest bed decorated by the most amazing decorator. We reached the hotel at a decent time (2am) which is AMAZING by indian standards (most couples wearily arrive at 5am the next day due to certain traditions etc). We were harassed a bit by G's cousins and aunts (they wouldn't leave the room until they were paid...HA HA) but it was all in good humor. Anyway so of course G and I got a little last minute gift tucked under our blankets (thanks to G's sister's husband and cousin brother who went shopping at the pharmacy earlier that day). We didn't discover the gifts until the next day though because they were REALLY tucked under those blankets.

We left for our honeymoon to the Maldives 2 days later, and had an amazing time in such a gorgeous tropical and PERFECT place (every beach I see now can't be compared!). Of course as all newlywed couples we utilized the little gift we got on our wedding night. :-)

A month passes, and I'm in Dharamsala visiting G's sister and husband. G's mom is with us as well. Both my sister in law and her husband are physicians, so I tend to become a little hypochondriac around them and ask them tons of questions about all sorts of random symptoms I may have had in life. After one particular discussion, my sister in law suspected I may have PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome). I've had a history of missed periods, size 12 jeans, and some hair issues (on face and body). So we walked down to her hospital one day and I got checked by her friend who specializes in glandular issues. He diagnosed me with PCOS straight away, saying that he was 99% certain I had the problem based on my history and symptoms and that I probably would have infertility problems once I decided to have children. But, before he started me on a few medications he wanted to get an ultrasound done just to check out the scene in my ovaries.

We walked down to the ultrasound labs, which in this particular Indian government hosptial were pretty chaotic. There was no line, but tons of folks waiting for an ultrasound. I felt guilty getting in right away since I was a relative of a doctor...most of the patients had been waiting all morning. Oh and it was FREEZING, the hospital had no heat and it was end of December. We had to bring our own supplies too, which was sort of weird since here in the USA I'm used to clinics having simple things like gauze and towels. The room was full of residents, physicians, and techinicians...and even a stray patient or two...but no matter I was told to take off my pants and lie down. The technician started the ultrasound on my stomach and immediately says "Are you sure you're not pregnant?" I laughed it off, totally not even taking it seriously. I mean we used protection, we were traveling a lot so not much alone time, and I knew my system down there was sort of "off" so I figured she was just mistaken. She said the uterus was abnormally large which is a good indication of pregnancy. I figured I must just have a really odd uterus! My sister in law, however, was ELATED and I don't think I've ever seen her happier. She started talking about babies and totally annoyed me because I was convinced I couldn't be pregnant.

We got the ultrasound pictures and my sister in law convinced me to take a pregnancy test. At this point I had to pee like there was no tomorrow and thought I would burst (I was told to have a full bladder at the ultrasound). So she rushed and bought a test and we ran upstairs in the hospital to a bathroom. Okay this bathroom was RIDICULOUS...I mean you'd think with the bathrooms in India improving so much over the past 10 years the physicians bathroom in a new hospital would be ENGLISH...but no, it had an odd English toilet that you had to squat on...hard to explain! Anyway so I took the test and it came out negative. My sister in law claims she saw a faint positive but I couldn't make out any lines.

We took the ultrasound pictures to an obgyn in the hospital to double check the findings. I am now amazed at what he said becausse he was obviously so wrong...he took one look at the photos and said NO there is no way this girl is pregnant, the teensy spot you see is actually a FIBROID and should be removed with an operation!

My sister in law, intelligent and brilliant physician that she is, didn't believe the obgyn and was convinced I was pregnant despite the pregnancy test. She took me back to her flat and I casually mentioned the whole funny scene to G, who was surprised but I assured him there was no way we could be pregnant. We went for a walk around the hospital grounds and went about our business as usual.

Two days later my sister in law got the itch to have me re-take the pregnancy test. I couldn't figure out why she wanted me to redo it, but I thought it's not like it's going to harm anything so I took the pee test early in the morning when the urine is most concentrated (apparently that really matters!) To my utter SHOCK the test came out positive. I showed the test to my sister in law's husband, who was brushing his teeth at the time and he took one look at it and shook my hands with a hearty "congratulations!" That set me over the edge...I crawled back into bed and started crying. Both my sister in law and her husband left the room and G tried to console me for the next hour while I tried to cover my face with the blanket. Both he and I were in shock.

G's mom got a whiff of what was going on, and came into the room very concerned thinking that I must have some strange disease for us to be behaving like that. Of course when we told her that no, I'm totally fine, just pregnant... she was as happy as can be!

The next few days were weird...G and I kept discussing how our lives would change, how all our plans for the next year for travel and my plans for career would be totally altered....I cried a few times more, I did a few yoga positions trying to make myself NOT pregnant...which was silly but I figured maybe I could will myself into a miscarriage. My sister in law kept scolding me everytime she saw me in a yoga asaan (asaan = position). I was told not to eat papaya, so of course I snuck a few pieces thinking it may end the pregnancy! (which I also learned later was just dumb...it was an old wives tale, only the really unripe papaya can actually cause harm, and that too with a low probability). We were traveling around to a bunch of touristy places those days, so in the car whenever my sister in law would start talking about the baby I would become moody and say how unhappy I was with the whole situation. G was silent and tried not to discuss the baby too much. We were just in so much shock for that whole week, we couldn't believe it was happening to us at that moment.

At one particular temple I finally decided to "talk" to God and figure this out. I'm not super religious but I was super stressed out...those are the times when everyone remembers God hehe. I basically said okay so if this is what you planned for me at this point in my life, despite knowing all the things I want to do and all the things G wants to accomplish...I will accept and deal with it and be happy that I'm getting a baby when so many others in this world can't have children. This baby situation is a prime example of one of my favorite quotes...We plan and God laughs.

Weeks later after I returned to the US I got double checked with an obgyn here. I also finally told my Mom. Her response was hilarious. The first thing she said was "So you guys had intercourse?" LOL...the next thing she said was "You should never use that brand condoms...why didn't you bring them from the the USA?" Umm...thanks Mom for after the fact advice! Hehe.

1 comment:

M D said...

I'm from Malaysia and I'm an Indian. I met my husband while undergoing exchange student program in AB, Canada. I went back home and continued with my studies but we both kept in touch religiously;) After a year, I came back to visit him (in April 2008). We planned to register our wedding here (by a Pastor) and then go back to Msia in Sept 2008 for a big Indian celebration. Then I would continue with my final semester at school while my husband would go back to Canada and prepare necessary things-house, permanent job etc.
SO for us, getting pregnant was a big NO-NO. However, after a month, I had this nagging feeling about pregnancy. I told my husband I could be pregnant but he just shrugged it off. I did pregnancy test and screwed up the first time. I saw two lines forming beautifully during the second attempt and I also tried with digital kit.
We had to postpone the wedding in Msia and also my school. And I've been in Canada ever since. Right now, I have to deal with PR issues with the immigration and also fighting to get health care coverage...
But being pregnant and feeling pregnant is just...beyond words. Especially when my baby kicks me vigorously every single day :)